Last Friday was a very bad day. It started off with me meeting some friends for lunch.. During lunch I had no idea about the shootings in Newtown. But, while sitting in my car afterwards, checking my phone (while parked) I quickly got caught up on the tragedy. I was crying, and so so mad/sad/confused/anxious/scared. Normally reading about terrible things that happen in the news doesn't really move me to the point of tears, but oh my gosh, reading about those children being killed, along with the teachers and administrators who loved them, totally rocked me to my core. Sadness turned to anger and I was pissed. I was pissed that someone would go that crazy. I was pissed that someone that mentally unstable would have access to guns. I was pissed that anyone had guns. I was pissed at guns. I was pissed no one saw a warning sign. You get the point. I was mad. But throughout the day, while reading the news and hearing more details, I became sad again. Then, Friday night and into Saturday morning I became thankful. I became thankful that there are teachers out there who truly, truly love their students. Reading the stories about the teachers who both lived and died trying their very best to save their classrooms moved me. I have many friends who are excellent teachers. One of which is on her way to becoming an elementary school principal, so of course, reading about the principal who threw herself at the mad gunman, quickly reminded me of her. Reading about the teachers who hid their students in cabinets and closets and bathrooms, later to die after saving the children, or to sit and read to the kids to calm them, made me think of my other friends, who I know would do the same in a heartbeat. Teachers will never get the credit they deserve.
This post is not about gun control, God being in or out of the classroom, mental stability, or anything political. This post is simply about good people who helped and tried to help other people. There is nothing I can type that can possibly capture the sorrow that I feel for the families who have lost a loved one. Adult or child, losing someone you love is incredibly hard. As a parent, there is nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, scarier than the thought of losing your child. Last night, when president Obama referenced a friend who compared parenthood as being like having your heart walking around on the outside of your body, he got it right. There is no love like the love a parent has for their child. This is why I wanted to write this post. I am thankful that there are people out there, other than myself, that are willing and able to protect our children while we, as parents, cannot be right beside of them. These teachers and administrators are proof of that. Not to mention the first responders, other school staff, police, and anyone else that I know I have left out. As terrible as the shooting was and still is, I am so moved that Vicki Soto, a 27 year old teacher gave her life trying to protect the children she loved. She is a hero. The principal, Dawn Hochsprung, who lunged at the shooter, in an attempt to stop him from shooting people in her school. She is a hero. All of the other victims are heroes. The survivors are heroes. Terrible things happened on Friday, but if you look beyond that, there are also some very moving and good things that happened too.
I thought to myself, I could move forward and think about this shooting and be mad about it. And realistically, I will probably become mad at some point thinking about it in the future. But, I am going to try my hardest to move on and only think about the good people that were there. The helpers, the heroes. Our world is a scary place. Sometimes it is hard to find the good. But, the good is there. God is there. Every day people are suffering. And tomorrow and the next day people will suffer. We can't live our life scared of the suffering. I am going to try my best to live the rest of my life looking for the good. I want to be a helper. I want to teach Ben how to be a helper. I know I will slip, and bitterness/anxiety/sadness/madness will try to come up and make it's way out and ruin a day here and there, but I find comfort in knowing that there is always a way for me, or you, to be a helper. To be a light of goodness in this world. My challenge to you is to become a helper. I hate to sound corny, but sometimes this world needs a little corniness. Sometimes the world needs an extra person to two to help someone carry their groceries to their car, or to pay for another person's lunch, or just to give someone a hug and look them in the eye and tell them that you hope they have a good day. We all need to hear that every once in a while. Sometimes we all need to be more patient, and intentionally be more kind.
I pray that those who are suffering find comfort somewhere. Please don't let yourself get lost in sorrow. There are good people in this world. People who care. Be a person who cares. Be a helper.
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